subjected dejected denial outright. no acceptance. foolish to think otherwise, otherwise too naive to know. incapable unrelenting the truth as it is. it is forgotten vague indefinite soon to be lost lost intrinsically to a ceasing state of mindlessness sense along a degrading decomposing continuum of continuing asinine thoughts thoughts considered uncommon insane that of which they are.
Here’s my very 1st playlist that I made on 8tracks. Enjoy!
"Got time for 10 awesome electro/trance/dance/techno tracks to kick off your day? It will get you all pumped up & energized to maximize your performance throughout the day :) Including tracks from Tiesto, Deadmau5, ATB, Armin Van Buuren, etc.
I don’t get sick very often…but when I do, I tend to get fiercely sick. I don’t know if that’s a good thing or a bad thing but I’ve always been like that ever since I was an infant…
Unfortunately, looks like I’m going to be in bed incapable of doing anything for at least a few more days… Well, except for probably listening to some music and ranting on social networking sites lol.
And the symptoms? Ridiculously high fever, pounding migraines extending all the way from the neck to the eye-sockets, annoying congestion/runny nose, high blood pressure, loss of smell/taste/voice, weird electric/coral sounds from the ears, lethargy of an old woman in her 80s, moments of confusion, and rather erratic form of insomnia - constantly waking up and unable to fall back asleep. I’ve been eating/drinking all the things I heard were great natural remedies for cold but nothing seems to be working.
I have a midterm coming up next Weds…the one that I haven’t really studied yet. So yeah…I’m pretty much SCREWED. Hah. What an awful timing to get sick… :P
It’s funny how things always tend to pile up on top of each other and become a problem (hmm..I guess, kind of like B-aggregates!) around an important upcoming occasion…and mess everything up. *sigh*
Anyways, I hope you guys all have a great rest of the weekend! …and don’t get sick!!
OH AND keep that packet of EmergenC in your pocket at all times…and if you ever come across a deathly sick person coughing like an 80 yr old man with lung problems…dispatch the packet into your water bottle, mix, and chug it in asap…anddd mission accomplished - you’ll be good to go (well…I’d say on about 7 in 10 of the times).
Bring me your brokenhearted. The ones that wore, everything on their sleeves, and found them tattered and torn, before sunrise.
Bring me your weary. The ones wasted inside the ticks of their clocks, lifeless within circles. Fabricated for “safety”.
Bring me the toothless. From bar fights and classroom brawls. Glass and wood tucked in their skin, blood trickling between broken knuckles.
Bring me the blue collars, and I’ll show you where true character lies. Steady and compassionate for every loss.
Fuck your Botox and your liposuction. Bring me imperfect.
Fuck your teeth whiteners, and false sets. Bring me broken.
Fuck your advertisements, and photoshopped bodies. Bring me flawed.
Fuck your television, and Hollywood. Bring me ugly.
I want to build upon the shores of driftwood and lost visions. Where dreams and futures, drowned themselves.
I want to show you beauty, in its purest form. Not on the internet. Not on Google. Not on the television. Not in a magazine. Not on a silver screen. But instead, just outside your fence made of concrete and barbed wire, in your backyard.
It’s on the ugly and forgotten where Wall Street was built. Where the first brick was laid. Where pride was found before money ran us all into the ground.
We (the people) used to own it all. Now, we own nothing.
One of the great things about Tumblr is that people use it for just about every conceivable kind of expression. People being people, though, that means that Tumblr sometimes gets used for things that are just wrong. We are deeply committed to supporting and defending our users’ freedom of speech, but we do draw some limits. As a company, we’ve decided that some specific kinds of content aren’t welcome on Tumblr. For example, we prohibit spam and identity theft.
Our Content Policy has not, until now, prohibited blogs that actively promote self-harm. These typically take the form of blogs that glorify or promote anorexia, bulimia, and other eating disorders; self-mutilation; or suicide. These are messages and points of view that we strongly oppose, and don’t want to be hosting. The question for us has been whether it’s better to (a)prohibit them, as a statement against the very ideas of self-harm that they are advancing, or (b) permit them to stay up, accompanied by a public service warning that directs readers to helplines run by organizations like the National Eating Disorders Association.
We are planning to post a new, revised Content Policy in the very near future, and we’d like to ask for input from the Tumblr community on this issue.
Here’s what we think the right answer is:
1. Implement a new policy against pro-self-harm blogs.Here’s draft language we are planning to add to our Content Policy:
Active Promotion of Self-Harm. Don’t post content that actively promotes or glorifies self-injury or self-harm. This includes content that urges or encourages readers to cut or mutilate themselves; embrace anorexia, bulimia, or other eating disorders; or commit suicide rather than, e.g., seek counseling or treatment for depression or other disorders. Online dialogue about these acts and conditions is incredibly important; this prohibition is intended to reach only those blogs that cross the line into active promotion or glorification. For example, joking that you need to starve yourself after Thanksgiving or that you wanted to kill yourself after a humiliating date is fine, but recommending techniques for self-starvation or self-mutilation is not.
We aim to begin implementing this policy next week. Of course, we will allow any affected blogs a grace period in which to edit or download your content.
2. Start showing PSAs on search results for related keywords. In addition, we plan to start posting “public service announcement”-style language whenever users search for tags that typically go along with pro-self-harm blogs. For example, when a user searches for tags like “anorexia”, “anorexic”, “bulimia”, “bulimic”, “thinspiration”, “thinspo”, “proana”, “purge”, “purging”, etc., we would show PSA language like:
Eating disorders can cause serious health problems, and at their most severe can even be life-threatening. Please contact the [resource organization] at [helpline number] or [website].
So that’s our plan. We’d like your feedback. If you have any comments or suggestions, please email them firstname.lastname@example.org.
I admit that I’m not proud about some things that I’ve done in the past. I’ve done things I said I’d never do and there were times that I became like the people that I hated. There were moments in my life wherein I felt so empty and devastated. In those moments, I was so desperate to find things that could cover up the holes in my heart and the scars of my soul—even if it was temporary. I felt so lost. I felt incomplete. And I’m not saying I did the right things, but I had my reasons. I know now that even to me, those reasons no longer make sense. I myself cringe at my own mistakes and regrets. We just have different ways of dealing with pain and loss. But that was then and this is now.
I’m not perfect. I’ve had my share of mistakes and decisions I wish I could take back. I felt numb as I committed all those acts that I thought would help me forget. But each time, I always felt ashamed of my foolishness and poor judgment of situations and of people. I was just so desperate for something to save me from drowning. And in that chaotic search for salvation, there were times that I found myself more lost than I was to begin with.
I know the mistakes that I made. I acknowledge them. I accept them. Because as much as I want to erase all the wrong things that I’ve done, I know it’s impossible. The mistakes and decisions that I made shaped me to be who I am now. The important thing is that you learn from what you did wrong and that you try your best not to repeat them. You should do all that you can to make yourself better. After we accept ourselves, what we need are people who can accept us despite the flaws we have and the things that we’ve done in the past.
Don’t let other people remember you for the wrong things that you’ve done before. Let them recognize you for the right decisions that you will make today.
Let the past go. Forgive yourself. That’s the only way to grow and become a better person. The past should no longer define who you are, because change is a continuous process. You will never be exactly like the way that you are before and that can be both a good and bad thing. Don’t allow stigmas to destroy you. Don’t let your scars define you. It’s up to you to change for the better.
Ditto. Agreed - live up your life and stop dwelling on the past… starting from today! It’s never too late to get up and try again. But your attitude matters the most. :)
“By candle light, souls entwine
amidst shallow breath and
heightened sensations, to love
to lust, to live; unified beneath
the surface of mortal physicality.
Melded bodies embrace
gravitational pull to fall
harder, faster until drowning.
Breathless but content and
never more alive than in this
moment. Spent but complete;
lost in the familiar surroundings
of loves heartbeat.”—(via graciouswords)
“Seek out the brightest star
in the clearest skies
and there you will find me;
with a heart full of love,
a head full of hopes and dreams
and a pocket full of every wish
you’ve ever thrown my way.”—(via graciouswords)
Researchers stumbled on a striking fact about suicides in New York: A surprising number of people who kill themselves in the city come here from out of town, and many appear to come expressly to take their own lives. In a report published last fall called “Suicide Tourism in Manhattan, New York City, 1990–2004,” researchers at the New York Academy of Medicine and Weill Cornell Medical College found that of the 7,634 people who committed suicide in New York City between 1990 and 2004, 407 of them, or 5.3 percent, were nonresidents. More strikingly, nonresidents accounted for 274, or 10.8 percent, of the 2,272 suicides in Manhattan during that time (the numbers did not include college students, who were considered residents for the purposes of the study). The researchers didn’t look at comparable data from other cities, but, says the study’s lead author, Charles Gross, “One in ten people that commit suicide in Manhattan don’t live here. That’s a big chunk.”